saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
