dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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