no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize
