Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize