i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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