Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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