Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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