so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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