Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
