I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
When did we convert life to cartoon?
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Randomize