I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
