Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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