I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize