Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Randomize
