yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
wanna go halves on a baby?
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
your like the ambassador to my penis.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
