dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
