Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize