I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
There r osticjed everywhere
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Randomize
