i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
