oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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