Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
