If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize
