I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
