I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Randomize
