umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
