So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
