This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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