Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
