you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
