I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
