I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
