do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize