i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
how do you play pong handcuffed?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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