I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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