Having a random hookup so left but love u
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
