And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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