So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
