Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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