Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Randomize
