ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
