im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
