If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
