D3 body, D1 cock
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize
