absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Randomize