I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
