he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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