it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
