one two three fourrrrnication!
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
i believe in u and ur pee
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