Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
