just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
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