Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
