just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
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